5 Keys to Understanding Why Your Life (probably) Sucks! #3
July 26, 2008
The outcome of Reason # 2 is that you become your own worst enemy. That, in turn, leads on to Reason # 3 where
You place more value on doing than being
If you are at war with yourself, chances are you don’t like yourself very much. How many other people who call you to account, who expect more of you than what you achieve are on your best friends list? That fact is as true in your relationship with yourself as it is in your relationships with other people.
The trouble is, you can distance yourself from others; you have to live with yourself. So, one of the ways to come to terms with that reality is to minimise the focus on who you are (which we have determined you don’t really like) and increase the focus on what you do.
After all, you can’t do much about who you are (or at least so you think) but you can choose what it is you want to do with your life.
There are lots of people who are playing the same game. How often after being introduced to someone does the conversation get around to what you do for a living. In answer to that question, depending on the situation, I often answer “breathe”.
5 Keys to Understanding Why Your Life (probably) Sucks! #2
July 22, 2008
In Key Reason #1 we looked at how you are working with outdated beliefs. Reason # 2 gives a clue as to why that might be so.
Your Capability has outstripped your Cope-ability
Have you ever been in a situation where you think to yourself ” I just can’t cope any more”? Psychologists’ and psychiatrists’ waiting rooms are full of such people for whom life has become too much.
That is because we choose to live at a level of awareness below that of which we are capable. The reason why people choose that lower level of awareness stems from the belief that they will not be able to cope with the responsibility that would be theirs at the higher levels. And so, a little like the crocodile which raises its eyes just above the water line only to sink below the surface again, they sink down into what they perceive as a safer environment.
The Happiness of Others
July 19, 2008
Is there any necessary connection between our actions and the happiness of others? Disregarding for a moment the murkiness of the definitions of “actions” in philosophical literature - two types of answers were hitherto provided.
Sentient Beings (referred to, in this essay, as “Humans” or “persons”) seem either to limit each other - or to enhance each other’s actions. Mutual limitation is, for instance, evident in game theory. It deals with decision outcomes when all the rational “players” are fully aware of both the outcomes of their actions and of what they prefer these outcomes to be. They are also fully informed about the other players: they know that they are rational, too, for instance. This, of course, is a very farfetched idealization. A state of unbounded information is nowhere and never to be found. Still, in most cases, the players settle down to one of the Nash equilibria solutions. Their actions are constrained by the existence of the others.
The “Hidden Hand” of Adam Smith (which, among other things, benignly and optimally regulates the market and the price mechanisms) - is also a “mutually limiting” model. Numerous single participants strive to maximize their (economic and financial) outcomes - and end up merely optimizing them. The reason lies in the existence of others within the “market”. Again, they are constrained by other people’s motivations, priorities ands, above all, actions.
Relationships and the Law of Attraction
July 17, 2008
This question and answer article was done by Gizelle River, Virtual Administrator and Writer. Visit her website.
G: Hi Michael. Today’s topic is relationships. In your hundreds of seminars and TeleClasses, what are people saying about their relationships or lack of them? What kind of complaints do you most often hear?
M: I’d like to start by saying that the amount of people on our planet who are single continue to surprise me. Having said that, the thing I hear people saying most often about attracting their ideal mate is that it’s HARD to do. I hear over and over again that there are no ‘good’ men or women left, or that people keep attracting *&#@* kinds of dates! People complain that all the ‘good’ prospects are already taken or that their dating experiences are disastrous. Of course, if they knew what I knew they’d know exactly WHY they are getting the kinds of relationships or dating experiences they are getting. You can hear it in the words they use when they comment! Half-way through my seminars, these people get their “Ahh-Hah!” moment! They learn that NOT getting their ideal relationship or partner has nothing to do with the availability of ‘good’ men or women. They learn that it’s all about the vibes they’ve been sending!
Choose To Be Happy
July 13, 2008
What if I told you that you have the ability to decide if you are happy or not. You would probably say that I’m crazy. 1. I’m not crazy and 2. Happiness is a choice.
You can’t depend on someone else to make you happy. That is a lesson I learned early on in my marriage. I realized that I couldn’t rely on my husband as my source of happiness. I learned that my happiness depended on me and not my husband’s actions. I learned that you have to choose to be happy.
You can choose your emotions. True happiness comes from within, it can’t be forced by outside forces. So how do you choose happiness? The same away you choose to smile or choose to wear a certain outfit. You choose it because that’s what you want to experience in your life.
You want to buy a new pair of shoes so you choose a pair that you like and feels good. You wouldn’t buy a pair of shoes that you don’t like or that don’t fit well, right? So why do we keep choosing emotions and feelings that don’t make us feel good?
Happiest Person In America: Whats Sex Got To Do With It?
July 10, 2008
Who is the happiest person in America? USA Today featured Happiest Person in a cover story in its USA Weekend magazine. Bad news: it’s not you. Nor is it me.
Just how did they find Happiest Person and determine that he is indeed the happiest person in America? The USA Today research team appears to have used an elegantly simple three-step process.
First, they identified “the world’s leading authority on happiness”, Martin Seligman … which must have come as a wee bit of a surprise to several of his equally well-known and equally well-respected peers. How they picked Seligman remains more of a mystery than how a land-locked nation of mountains and yodeling became home to the holy grail of yachting, but we are working feverishly to crack the code.
Next, they asked Seligman to name six principles of happiness. Seligman listed couple strengths, a win-win approach, savoring success, playing to one’s strengths, opening doors to opportunity and finding meaning in life.
Finally, they applied Seligman’s principles to determine who best matches them. Naawww, just kidding. That would make way too much sense. Instead, USA Today created a make-believe process of its own that stands out from Seligman’s list like the Jolly Green Giant at a dwarf convention. Here is the USA Today process.
Choose Happiness
July 6, 2008
It’s a beautiful spring day in Beverly Hills, California. I’m looking out my window at elm trees in full leaf and roses in full bloom, and thinking about the people who helped me get where I am today.
Mark Johnson was the kind of guy some people love to hate. He was always in a great mood and always had something positive to say. When he saw you, he enthusiastically boomed, "Hello, my friend!" When you asked him how he was, he nearly shouted, "I’m on top of the world!" I was sometimes a little embarrassed by his noisy exuberance, but I was glad he was my friend.
Mark was a unique worker at the Phelps Dodge Copper Mine in my home town of Ajo, Arizona. The miners followed him around. Because of his attitude, he was a natural motivator. If one of the guys was having a bad day, Mark was there to help him see the bright side of any situation. Once I remember him taking one of the men to the bank with him after work. I later learned that Mark had personally given over half his check to help that man cover his family’s medical bills. It wasn’t the first time Mark had done this. Many could testify to his generosity.
Happiness Is A State Of Mind, Im Happy… I Think!
July 3, 2008
You have the power to attract and repel anything in life you want! It’s all in your hands. Contentment, happiness, and joy are right around the corner. Hang in here with me; some of this is going to go against the grain of previous thinking.
The Moment Of Truth!
Regardless of whom you are, you are unique, you are special, and you are a wonderful person. Yet, certain people may not think so. :>) if you feel that they react negatively and offensively to many things that you say and do, you may discover some insight here: They are just as human as you are.
You might not want to believe this but; everything that makes you special makes them special. If something offends you, it might also offend them. If something influences you, in some given manner, the same thing might also influence them.
Undesirable reactions on the part of others could be due to what you say and how you say it. Or, it could be because of inner attitudes and your true inner feelings.
You are Where You are Because You Decided to be There
June 29, 2008
The decisions we make everyday have a big impact on where we are in life, both spiritually and physically. Often these decisions are the ’safe’ choices. People don’t often venture too far off from familiar paths or too far out of their comfort zones and challenge themselves. As Aristotle the great Greek philosopher said, “Man perpetuates the familiar,” and especially teens. The obvious reason not wanting to appear different than their friends. They are afraid of being teased or ostracized from their peer group if they venture too far. They rather let opportunities pass them by than be shunned by the group that helpes define them.
Teenagers do you find yourself in a rut? If so, be honest with yourself and determine why. Are your friends holding you back from venturing forth? Are you concerned about what they might say? If they are true friends they will be the first to encourage you, if they don’t, ask yourself, then ask them why. The answer you arrive at should indicate to you whether they are a true friend. Odds are they will be encouraging and perhaps follow your lead. You will have then become a trend setter. Be bold and rise above the crowd. Start immediately. All progress starts but with a single step.
If You Can Dream It you Can Do It!
June 27, 2008
Confuscious, the Chinese Philospher is quoted as saying : “I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.” In other words, it is in the ‘doing’ that we appreciate and learn the meaning of an action or activity, not in thinking or day dreaming about it.
Many teens daydream often about the things they would like to do. Do you? If you can ‘dream,’ you can ‘do.’ You need to maintain a positive ‘can do’ attitude and like many successful people have done, you need to write your goals down along with a timetable and plan for achieving them. You need to discover what it will take, what your willing to do to accomplish your goal, identify possible obstacles and determine how you will overcome them. You must resolve to stay the course even when other’s discourage you or when problems seem insurmountable.
And there will many of those times; if it were easy everyone would be a star. Post reminders of your goals in prominent places like your bedroom mirror. Give yourself a pep talk every day. Reward yourself when you make significant strides.
Need more help on goal setting write us at info@lunchbagnotes.com.
